Technology, Schmecknology


I used to be the “go-to girl” when it came to electronic device set-up and usage.  There was a time when how-to-use anything that plugged into a wall socket was within my grasp and control.  I could set up any computer and even troubleshoot hardware or software problems…without having to call the geek squad to come check it out.  

If I did call upon a techie to fix a problem (at work), it was because they had some patch or update that I couldn’t get online.  Sometimes, though, I only called them because I liked talking to them (as opposed to clients or co-workers).  Occasionally I’d get one that was obviously socially retarded,  but for the most part, I’d get a good one, and we’d spend an hour or two BS ing while he fixed my latest problem that should have taken 20 minutes. 

I’ve never been an expert, by any stretch of the imagination, but I knew just enough to find out the rest, and I had a valid INTEREST in it.  Now that I’m old, I could care less about any of it.  I can barely figure out how to play a blu-ray disc on my television.  I have to call my 15 year old to come help me put batteries in things.  It’s really pathetic. 

I’ve also noticed that the older I get, the less I’m able to functionally interact with the techies.  They are getting weirder as the years go by.  Younger and weirder.  It’s as though the personality to intelligence ratio has been skewed somehow during the past oh, say, 7 years or so.  I don’t even like to look at them now, with their shirts all tucked into their too-short and too-tight pants and their hair combed by their mothers before they walk out of their parents’ houses every morning.  Though they have been depicted this way for years on tv and movies, I really did not see that much of it until lately.  Have they bought in to the stereotype?  I don’t know, but someone should really step up and offer these guys some sort of personality/fashion rehab.  (But I digress).

My point here is that I’m feeling my age, because although I realize that while some people have just never been tech-savvy, and that doesn’t make them old, per se,  but I have always associated the inability to converse with technical people and an apathy for all things that require more than two steps to complete (unlike, say, a toaster), with being OLD.  And now, I’ll happily allow my teenage son updates the OS on my IPhone for me if it means that I don’t have to make split second decisions about what I want to overwrite or sync or whatever, for fear I’ll delete all 1200 songs off the Ipod.  I think I want an IPhone 4, but when I start reading about the new features and differences, I yawn and become disinterested.  I updated the OS on my 3G to 4 (see how stupid that sounds), and now I’ve got all kinds of bugs in my phone. (No, not real bugs, old people).  I could probably fix it if I downloaded some updates, but I’d really rather just bitch about it every time my phone freezes up for 20 seconds.  Yep, I’ve definitely become “that guy.”

So, there it is.  I’m officially technologically OLD, and I’m fine with it.  I’ll just have my son do everything from now until they put me in a nursing home.  And even then, he’ll have to come over to program my brand new ginormous remote control for my 13 inch tv. And don’t bother with filling me in on the details, sonny…I don’t care… and I won’t do it next time it needs doing even if you show me how, I’ll just make you come back to do it again.

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About zohrbak

Zohrbak is an old email username I had a while back...it's a made-up twist on two characters from Spaceghost. Zorak and Brak. I'm a geek. I am a married, working mother of 4 children, ages 4-15. I also have interests outside of my children, but I can never remember what they are.
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8 Responses to Technology, Schmecknology

  1. Aimee says:

    The blue is fine. Very cheery.

    I agree totally with this post. I no longer care. The craziness with the updates and freezing and constant changes with the technology of the iphone is one of the many things that converted me to blackberry. I had 2, both of which spazzed irrepairably. Edious always bitches about his. There is a cool new Blackberry out, and if I had one, I’d like it, but I really don’t want to change, cuz then I’d have to transfer my contacts and all that stuff so I probably will keep the one I have until it dies or I kill it, which is more likely to happen.
    As far as other technology, I never watch tv anymore so I have forgotten how to work the entire entertainment system. I USED to know, but don’t anymore. lol. Dont ask me about how to work the game systems for sure. I don’t know, don’t wanna know. lol. I don’t even stay updated with my own PC anymore bc I have a couple of computer savvy friends who help me out with it, so I don’t have to think much.

    Maybe I am getting old… but I prefer thinking that I am just getting wiser in my choices of things to which I appropriate my time. I delegate out things which I don’t particularly want to think about to those who already have thought about it.

    I read an article about making your life simpler. I’m now for that. I am pretty sure I could live with just a couple pair of comfy jeans and t-shirts, some flip flops, a coffee pot, and my toothbrush.

  2. Ryan says:

    this is right on. ditto on the “used to be the go to guy” for stuff. now I get aggravated at birthday parties when somebody hands me their new digital camera to “figure it out”. I’m tired of it all. My memory stick is held together with two bands of black electrical tape cause I don’t want to get another one and copy and paste from the old one to it. Our “brand new” computer we got for Christmas is working fine right now, but when (and it WILL happen) it starts freaking out because of some virus or malware problem, I’m gonna go get a new one. I’d rather do that then go through the probably 30 minute process of burning restore disks (whatever the shit that is) and re installing the operating system. It literally makes me sleepy trying to figure the techie stuff out these days.

    • zohrbak says:

      You know what really t’ed me off? We went to watch Avatar on Blu ray on our fairly new blu ray player about a month ago. We had to install a freakin’ software update on the damn thing to be able to watch it. It took two weeks to figure this crap out. There’s a usb port on the backside of the player. OMG!

      • Ryan says:

        software update for a friggin VCR? (that’s what we used to call them, kids) that’s an outrage!

  3. Pat says:

    See? This is what it’s really like, folks…Does that mean we now have to call my favorite 15 yr old grandson for stuff now? Cause I will call whoever, I don’t are who fixes it or what it has to have to get fixed. lol

  4. Jalyn says:

    OMGosh!!! Zohrbak U R A TRIP!!! The highlight of my day (when I remember…I’m sure you can understand this) is reading your blogs…have you ever considered quitting your day job to stay home and write a WHOLE BOOK??? I would buy it!!! I would be the first in line to get your autograph at your first book signing!!! Can I be president of your fan club?? heheheeh

    • zohrbak says:

      Yes, you may be president of my fan club, although there is no fan club, and if there were, I think the members of the fan club should vote on the president, which I couldn’t do because I can’t be a member of my own fan club, because I’m not a narcissist. (I don’t think.) In all seriosity…thanks for the kind words….it’s nice to hear that my “free therapy” is entertaining someone every once in a while!

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