[do not read this post] Confession Thursday

I hope that the title convinced a large number of people NOT to read this post.  Because my confession today is a bit personal and some might say embarrassing.  If you are reading this, in spite of the title, then I must remind you of my NUMBER ONE rule for Confession Thursday:  We do not judge each other on Confession Thursday.  And by “we” I mean “you” and by “each other” I mean “me”. 

Here’s my confession on this Confession Thursday: 

I pee in the shower. 

Oh, come on!  It’s not that bad!  I mean, it’s not like I’m bathing in the toilet.  And I don’t pee in the bathtub, or the pool.  I would even have a hard time peeing in a lake unless it was an emergency.  But peeing in the shower just seems so natural.  Here you are, nekkid, with warm, soapy water running all over you…the real question is…why WOULDN’T you pee in the shower?  You are conserving water inasmuch as you are saving a flush every time you opt to pee in the shower instead of the toilet.  It’s totally green.  Hell, even Madonna does it.  I say that as though Madonna has such high moral and ethical standards.   That’s not what I’m proposing.  I’m only trying to say that people do this, and it’s nothing to be ashamed of.  (Right?) I mean, urine is sterile and studies have shown that it’s possible that peeing in the shower helps fight athlete’s foot *Disclaimer:  I am not independently aware whether there are such studies, and whether they do, in fact, show that athlete’s foot can be prevented by urinating on one’s feet.  But I saw it written somewhere once.

Also, I think there are much nastier habits that people have in the shower that we should focus on.  Por ejemplo:  How come some people don’t use washcloths to bathe themselves? I’m sorry, but there are certain “parts” of my body that require the use of an accessory such as this.  And I don’t just mean my never-you-mind parts.  Like, ear canals, for example…  because Q-tips are for the follow-up work that a washcloth wrapped over a little finger just can’t get to.  

Additionally, since I am the human being assigned resigned to cleaning the damn shower, I see no reason why I can’t do whatever the hell I want to in there.  If you’ve ever cleaned a shower, then you know that shaving in the shower is a much nastier habit than peeing in one.  The little hairs just hang out there until you clean it.  The pee pee is gone before you ever step out of the shower.  Here’s another pet peeve of mine:  Automatic Shower Cleaner.  It’s not so much the product I am opposed to, it’s the advertisement for it.  They actually say it Gets a Dirty Shower Clean in Days!  Now, just exactly how frickin lazy do you have to be to go through the trouble of going to a store, purchasing this product, and then installing it in your dirty ass shower and then waiting for three days for it to clean it?!  Really?  And how does it magically clean your “dirty” shower.  What does it do with those little freshly-shaven hairs and the little bits of soap left over from old bars that falls to the shower floor and turn to absolute goo? Does it just vaporize them?  And so what the hell is it going to do to your shower walls if it’s capable of such feats?

Anyway.  I sometimes forget that people read the stuff I type.  I’m sorry that this confession was a total TMI Fest.  Forgive me.  But remember, judge me not. 

Now, it’s your turn.


About zohrbak

Zohrbak is an old email username I had a while back...it's a made-up twist on two characters from Spaceghost. Zorak and Brak. I'm a geek. I am a married, working mother of 4 children, ages 4-15. I also have interests outside of my children, but I can never remember what they are.
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12 Responses to [do not read this post] Confession Thursday

  1. YaYa says:

    Haha, Me too!! I pee in my husband’s shower, I laugh to myself everytime I hear him get in the shower, get out of the shower and then he pees in the toilet. I wonder if it would make him mad if he knew I pee’d in his shower??

    I also showed my 2 year old how to make bubbles in the bath tub by farting. He thinks it’s hilarious and he will gladly tell you, “I part”….

    • ZOHRMOM says:

      YaYa, kids (especially boys) learn enough gross things on their own. Please don’t help litttle YaJay learn anything else.

    • zohrbak says:

      I’m confused…are you confessing to farting in the tub as an example? And if so, then EWWWWWWWWWWW! Get right the hell out of town!!!!

      • ZOHRMOM says:

        I don’t take baths, wish I did. But I do not fart in the tub. I was simply pointing out to YaYa that boys need no help in learning such things.

      • YaYa says:

        NUMBER ONE rule for Confession Thursday: We do not judge each other on Confession Thursday. And by “we” I mean “you” and by “each other” I mean “me”.

  2. dongtacular says:

    You saying [don’t read this post] made me curious enough to read it. And I’m glad I did!

    I don’t pee in the shower. Like you, I can’t pee in a lake either. But it still doesn’t feel right to pee where I’m washing myself.

    Not that I’m judging you, I know quite a few people who piss in their showers (this actually comes up in conversation quite regularily for me) and they state the same reasoning as you.

    I look forward to your next (dirty) confession!

  3. ZOHRMOM says:

    What a wonderful conversation this will make. I will say that I wash nothing below my “bottom” in the shower. I see absolutley no reason to wash my legs or feet when I am standing in soapy water. I don’t dry my feet either. PS> This must be what Zohruncle was talking about when he said finding out too much about you made him nervous. lol

    • Zohrcous says:

      Haha Zohrmom (aka Zohrnanny, Zohruncle’s sis), you got that right!! I don’t think he wants TMI from anyone, not just Zohrbak. That’s why FB will never be an option.

      ps…I pee in the shower, too. I learned from my husband. At first I thought this was disgusting, but I figured my pee is better than his pee, so why not? What still disgusts me is when he blows his nose in the shower…those bugers probably don’t wash out very well. But I let my cleaning lady tend to those. Zohrbak, well worth the money every couple weeks.

      pps…my husband would hate me if he found out I shared this bit of TMI about him, so please (if you ever see him) don’t tell him I told you. Thanks.

      • zohrbak says:

        Change your name to ZohrCuz. lol. Also, thank you for admitting to being guilty of the same crime against nature as me. And even worse, thanks for being guilty of posting it on the internet. I was starting to feel like a bit of an outcast. Now that three people have had the guts to admit to it, I don’t feel like such a loser.

        Love you!

        Oh, and tell ZohrCuzHubby I said hello! 🙂

  4. Aimee says:

    rotflmao…. I will say that I normally do not pee in the shower. Not bc I have like this big problem with the idea of it, but bc the minute i turn on the shower, the sound of the water makes me need to pee, so I sit on the toilet and pee while the water gets warm in the shower. So, by the time I get in I have already peed. So, I dont have a reason to pee in the shower. As far as farting in the tub, lol, I probably would if the need arose. Its a hell of a lot better than farting in, say, a car with other people or in a small room. And the bubbles would LEAVE the water. My boys do regularly tell stories about farting in the tub and how it smells worse and so forth. But thats boys for you.

    Also, I have to point out that I am very much amused by the name of one of the commenters of this blog as by the blog itself. Someone’s user name is actually DONGTACULAR. lol. Really? Dongtacular. LMAO. Awesome.

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